Harry Potter Meets Frodo and Pigs Fly
by Lydia
Summary: Harry Pot meets Precious! Learn about two evil plots that you already knew about! *Update* Frodo and Harry have now met at Badlamort, Sauron and Saruman's ball! R&R PLEASE!
1. The Train Ride

**Harry Potter Meets Frodo and Lots o' Other People, sequel to Harry Potter and Precioussssssss.**  
  
  


  
That's right, the SEQUEL to Harry Potter and Precioussssss. Whoohoo, only a few days later and I'm writing another one. This one with thanks to Godiva and Garhedeli....Hmmm, I'll need to go get another chocolate so I can spell that proporly.  
PS: Yes, I've read both the book and seen the movie of the Fellowship. ^_^  
  
Anyhoo, on with ze fic!  
  
PPS: If anyone touches my preciousssssss, I'll--I'll, do somethign bad! ::giggles greedily::  
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It was Harry Pot's birthday and he was having a party. His cousin Dudley Durselhoo gave him a hug, and his Uncle Vermin gave him fifty dollars (whats the equivilant of pounds?) and his Aunty Petunafish (that's pronounced Pet Tunafish) gave him a playstation2 and a big screen TV to play it with.  
Harry was really happy. Then he got a letter from his Gawdfather Sirus Blackish-gray color. Harry opened it quickly, looking for money.  
"WHAT?!" He said, tearing the letter a part. "No MONEY? The nerve! I'll-I'll-I'll kill him!" Harry jumped up and down angrilly. His owl Neckwig flew into the room with is Pigwarts letter. "Godammit, get out!" He yelled at her. She flew away happily, dropping the letter on his bed as she made her way towards the window.  
  
The next day--er, month--Harry was on the train. Herm and Ron where sleeping, so he pulled out his diary.  
  
_September 1  
Dear diary,  
today I went on the Pigwarts Railway to get to school. Ron's been made headless boy, even though he's only a sixth year! And Hermione and me are Defects! Isn't that just totally cool? I was like, oh, my, GAWD, and Herm was all, like, cool, and whatever. That Draco Malloy guy came into the compartment, and Ron was so happy he acidently turned Malloty into a frog! This was the best day ever!_  
  
After the train ride, Harry, Hermione and Ron went to the feast. They where the guests of honor. When no-body was looking, Dimbledork slipped silver sickles into their pockets. Then the sorting begun.  
  
  
  


(to the tune of South Side)_  
See myself in the pouring home  
see the light come over now  
see myself in the pouring rain  
I watch hope come over me  
yeah, yeah  
here we are now, going to the south side  
I pick up my friends and we start to ride  
ride all night, we ride all day  
some may come and some may stay  
here we are in the pouring home  
i watch the light man fall the comb  
i watch a light move across the screen  
i watch the light come over me   
yeah, yeah  
here we are now going to the west side  
weapons in hand as we go for a ride  
some may come and some may stay  
watching out for a sunny day  
where there's love and darkness and my sidearm   
_  
  


  
Everyone clapped when the sorting hat finished it's song. Suddenly, Gwen Stefani, Moby and some please-mens burst into the room.  
"You thah, you ah undah arrest for stealing that song, sah!" The head Please-men said. So they took the sorting hat and arrested it.  
"No matter!" Said Dimbledork after they arrested it. "Everyone can just go in Gryffinwindow, 'cause that's the best house." The new students clapped wicked loud. Some where singing "South Side".   
  
**At the same time, over in Mount Doom....**  
Baldamort, Sauron and the Saruman(the one that betrayed Gandalf) where having tea.  
"So old chap," Sauron said, "How's your plan to takeo over Earth going?"  
"Just fine. If that stinky Harry Pot wouldn't keep tripping me, I'd have it already. How's your plan to conquer Middle earth going?"  
"Quite well. I've just about got the magical ring from that Bobbit--Frodo Haggins, is his name--and once I have it, my job will be easy. By the way, have you heard from our dear friend Visser One lately?"  
"Oh, didn't you hear?" Baldie said sadly. "Poor old Vissy is in prison. the BannanaMorphs got him."  
"Oh dear! Poor old chap." Saruman said.  
"Really? I was so sure he was winning." Sauron said.  
"Yes well, he did lose is temper quite a bit." Baldie added.  
"True, true." Saruman said.  
"Wait! It has come to me!" Baldie jumped up and kowcked the milk over. "We'll take down Harry Pot, Frodo Haggins and save Visser One all at once! It's brilliant!"  
"How?" Sauron asked exitedly.  
"We invite them to a ball, and then figure it out from there!" Baldie was giggling exitedly.  
"Yeah!" Saruman exclaimed. "It just might work! And can we get Alus Dimbledork too?"  
"Yeah!" They all yelled and slapped high-fives.  
  
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Yay! This one will have two....or maybe even three chapters! R&R PLease!  
  
**Comming soon to a computer near you....**  
Chapter Two of the Famous H.P. and Precioussssss series squel!  
Will the ball be a sucsess? Will Harry and Frodo get along? And more importantly, will Lydia's chocolate supply run out? Find out more in the next chapter of...HARRY POT MEETS FRODO AND LOTS OF OTHER PEOPLE!  
  
  



	2. The Ball

**Chapter Two: The Ball  
  
**

Harry giggled nervously. He was going to a ball! He read over the invitation again, making sure he didn't miss anything.  
  
_Dear Mr. Pot,  
We are pleased to inform you that you have been invited to Baldie, Sauron and Saruman's Ball of the Year. Remember, this is NOT an elaborate plan to kill you so don't bother being on guard. You can bring Mr. Weasel and Miss Grandma if you'd like. _  
_ - Lord Baldamort  
  
_Harry ran down the hall into his charms class room. He looked at the clock on the wall and realized it was ten minuets into class. "Sorry Professor Flipwhip!" Harry said, sitting down next to Ron and Hermione.  
"It's okay Pot. It was that Malloy kid again, wasn't it?"  
Harry thought quickly. "Yessir, he's quite annoying."  
"Well, remind me to take fifty points from Slythery for that foul act of meaness," Flipwhip said. "Now, since Pot wasn't here for the first half of class, we'll award Gryffinwindow ten points."  
Everyone cheered.  
"Now lets start doing our Singing Charms. Mr. Soggybottum, would you start please? You can preform it the charm on the next Slythery to walk by the door. They all turned around n their seats so they could see the door. Just as Soggybottum got up, Draco Malloy passed by the door.  
"Hey Malloy!" Neville Soggybottum called.  
"Y-y-yes?" Draco Malloy slowly walked into the room.  
"Singaringa BritneySpearso!" Neville cried.  
Malloy twitched a little, then stated singing--  


"Oh baby, baby  
Oh baby, baby Oh baby, baby  
How was I supposed to know  
That something wasn't right here  
Oh baby baby  
I shouldn't have let you go  
And now you're out of sight, yeah  
Show me, how you want it to be  
Tell me baby  
'Cause I need to know now what we've go!"   


Malloy was now dancing on Flipwhip's desk. The Gryffinwindows where laughing their heads off.  
Malloy continued--  


"Sometimes I run  
Sometimes I hide  
Sometimes I'm scared of you  
But all I really want is to hold you tight  
Treat you right, be with you day and night  
Baby all I need is time....  
  
...I'm not a girl  
Not yet a womam  
All I need is time  
A moment that is mine  
While I'm in between....  
  
...I've got the urge   
(i can i can)   
I can wait another minute."  
  


The Gryffinwindows where now laughing harder then ever. Malloy continued--  
  


"I've got the urge to herbal (oh baby baby)  
oh yeah yeah (oh yes)  
I can wait another minute  
I've got the urge to herbal  
It's all so natural!"  
  


Everyone clapped as Flipwhip murmerd the counter curse and shoved Malloy out of the room.  
"He's got the urge!" Bean Thimas sang.  
They where all laughing so hard FlipWhip dismissed the class.  
  
Later that night, after Harry and Ron and Hermoine had second dinner, they all sat in the Common room singing the Herbal Essence song with the other Gryffinwindows.  
Suddenly, Ron jumped up and shouted-- "I doesn'tith knowith what I shalt ware-ith!"  
"Oh no!" The Gryffinwindows shouted.  
So Harry, Ron and Hermione went to Abercrombie and Fitch in Pigslady to find Ron something to wear to the ball.  
"How about this?" Hermione held up a shirt with pink flowers on it.  
"Nah." Harry said. "Too girly."  
"I've got it!" Ron said excitedly. He held up a lavender colored shirt with a rabbit on it.  
"Perfect!" Harry exclaimed.  
As they where exiting A&F, Hermione noticed something. A pig was flying!  
"Cool!" Harry and Ron exclaimed.   
"Oh no!" Hermione said. "Now I have to go out with that geek, Cedric Diggumup. I told him I'd go out with him when pigs fly."  
  
The next night was the ball. As Harry, Ron and Hermione where gettin' down on the dance floor, Baldamort, Sauron and Saruman where sitting at their table gossiping.  
"So I says to meself, I says, Sauron, (hiccup), that dang Bobbit ain't as tough as he says (hiccup), I says!" Sauron said loudly, downing another bottle of beer.   
"Frodo's a Bobbit-Wobbit!" Baldie exclaimed.  
Sauron and Saruman laughed loudly. "Bobbit-Wobbit! Hahahhahaaaa!"  
Suddenly, the doors burst open and Lord Asriel walked in.  
"Oy, Asriel!" Saruman yelled. "Over 'ere!" But Lord Asriel was already on the floor, dancing with Narcissa Malloy Saruman just shrugged and grabbed another beer.  
  
Down on the floor, Harry was dancing his heart out. As Dirty Pop began to play, he decided it was time for a drink, so he went over to the punch table. He was two feet away from the table when he smacked into something. Confused, he looked down. Who should be standing there rubbing his nose but Frodo Haggins, the Bobbit!  
"Hey, who you lookin' at?!" Frodo complained.  
"I wouldn't be lookin' if you hadn't been in my way. Move it shorty!"  
"Who you callin' short?!" Frodo glared at him.   
Harry was enraged. Didn't that Bobbit know who he was? "Do you even know who I am?!" Harry yelled.  
"Yeah," said Frodo. "The git who crashed into me!"  
"Alright, that's it!" Harry attacked Frodo. Suddenly, the music switched from Dirty Pop to We Will Rock You. Everyone had retreated to the edge of the dance floor to watch the fight.  
Harry pulled his wand out. Forgetting what it was for, he started hitting Frodo over the head with it. Frodo then pulled his ring out and started trying to stuff it up Harry's nose. Suddenly, the door burst open. Standing their with her hands on her hips, stood Lydia. She glared at Frodo and Harry. "Alright, which one of you has my precious?!"  
"I ain't got it!" Frodo exclaimed, hiding the ring behind his back. Harry, who was a little slow on uptake was still beating Frodo over the head with his wand. With is other hand he grabbed the ring from behind Frodo's back . "Ah-hah!" He yelled triumphantly.  
"Okay mister, hand it over!" Lydia grabbed the ring from Harry. "Time out for both of you!" She snapped her fingers and Dirty Pop came back on. She marched out of the room, clutching her Precious. Poor Harry and Frodo where sent to bed without their supper.  
  
**Coming soon to a computer near you...  
**What will happen to Baldie, Sauron and Saruman's plan? Did Ron drink to much punch? Will Harry and Frodo every get along? And more importantly, will Lydia be banned from eating sugar? Find out in the next chapter of Harry Pot meets Frodo!


End file.
